The weather change has been like a time zone change and I find myself thinking of everything under the sun that I need to do before next chemo (and last!) this coming Tues, June 9th. Mostly I am planning my future and those plans seem so inconsistent when my body isn't up to doing all that my mind has planned for it.
First off, a catch up on the California week last week; even with June gloom and reverse weather conditions (I thought I was going to soak up the sun and turned out Seattle had the incredible weather and LA rained) I had a fabulous time. Success was the word for the reunion of 4 of us classmates who had not all convened since 1969-young and influential 7th graders we were at the time. From different corners of the world we came with youthful strengths and dreams; together a power to be reckoned with. We have been pillars of strength for each other in various ways and shared secrets like the Ya Ya Sisterhood that only those from ASIJ (American School in Japan) could understand. This is the start of a new book.
Dad was the gracious host in Palos Verdes Estates. We had our week full of family connections: Eileen (youngest of 5 siblings) and daughter, Natalie, just 2 years old, shopped for belated birthday present and later completed a pair of mosaic flip flops with Debbie (my best friend from Japan who stayed with us for the long weekend). Steve and I did our usual Real Estate tour along the beach communities and walked the Strand once again. The ocean pulls each time I visit, I feel I am meant to be on the water. I had to get my fix by climbing down the bluff across from Dad's house on Thursday. There I found shell treasures, young people out on an adventure (the only ones who venture down the cliff side are either surfers, scuba divers, or homeless people it seems-certainly not for the week in the knees) driftwood huts and fire pits, and rotting seal carcases! After nearly tripping over several and hearing that there were a dozen more up ahead, I headed up a new-to-me trail about a mile down the beach. Near the top it got steep enough to grab a rope that was tied to a root up the hill and, with 3 shells in tow, I managed to reach the top without dropping anything (cell phone included). I called Steve to tell him I was headed home and safe on the road again. He always thinks I get too close to the edge so I cannot take him with me anymore. Sunday we took a road trip to San Clemente to visit Warren, wife Claire, and daughter Sheri (Jena is in Tanzania-a travel bug like me) and Karen and son Dean met us there for lunch coming up from San Diego. We visited the Farmer's Market historic Casa Bonita (correct me please I know that is wrong), then checked out a few open houses along the beachfront. We stopped at the Wayfarer's Chapel and crashed a wedding on the way home.
Monday we made the trek downtown to the fashion district to buy some bling and fashion statements with Maggie, and had lunch with Susan (the other 2 musketeers from Japan days), at her restaurant, The First Cup.
4;30 am Tuesday came all too soon as we caught the plane home to sunny Seattle.
Thursday, June 4, 2009
Monday, May 25, 2009
A Rollin' Stone Gathers no Moss
That's what we used to sing as kids along with the records we played, and now I actually get it! I was thinking how stuck I could get just laying in bed and succumbing to the sick feeling that I awoke with-hoping that if I just pulled the covers back over my head the bad taste in my mouth would just go away. After awhile of missing master swim workouts, not running, feeling too dizzy to either drive or ride my bike,not seeing my friends who have gone off on vacation, and feeling sorry for myself, I rolled out of bed and began making appointments with people I knew would get me going in the morning. Not to mention that this is the nicest weekend and great introduction to the glorious summer that is ahead of us...9am and the skies were dark and the heat of the previous day had dissipated to a cool cloudy morning as we launched the kayaks. The water was not glass as I had hoped, but Sandy met me beaming with enthusiasm for a sport she had not attempted before. The eagles soared overhead and we headed across the lake to see if we could find turtles on the eastern banks of the Lake. Nearly a half hour later and many giggles and photos on Sandy's new phone (glad she didn't drop it in the water) later, the sun burst through the clouds and we were off to a grand weekend. Penny called me to get Mylo, my granddog who is visiting while her parents are off to the Gorge camping and partying, out for a walk with her dog Marley. When you have a dog you have to get out for walks or listen to them bark-in Mylo's case. She has ceaseless energy when it comes to fetching balls.
The later part of the day saw more traffic on the lake which Sean accommodated by taking me out on the boat. Then back to the Casita for a barbecue. It doesn't get much better.
Now that I have cleaned up a few of those 100/day emails, I can get ready to leave town for California to be assured of sunshine (altho I hear that the weather is staying nice here-it figures) for the entire week I will be gone.
How fast does the stone have to roll to gather no moss? I was imagining a feather being tossed in the air and watching it float slowly to the ground. Or a maple tree whirley that swirls around and around; each eventually end up on the ground unless caught by another breeze and tossed into the air again, only to gather moss when they finally settle.
The later part of the day saw more traffic on the lake which Sean accommodated by taking me out on the boat. Then back to the Casita for a barbecue. It doesn't get much better.
Now that I have cleaned up a few of those 100/day emails, I can get ready to leave town for California to be assured of sunshine (altho I hear that the weather is staying nice here-it figures) for the entire week I will be gone.
How fast does the stone have to roll to gather no moss? I was imagining a feather being tossed in the air and watching it float slowly to the ground. Or a maple tree whirley that swirls around and around; each eventually end up on the ground unless caught by another breeze and tossed into the air again, only to gather moss when they finally settle.
Tuesday, May 12, 2009
Monday, May 11, 2009
Mother's Day
Yesterday was the perfect day! Dan called me early in the week and asked whether I wanted breakfast, or dinner, or both-and began the plans for the day. It was decided that we would meet early for a bike ride (I am so glad the weather cooperated and the sun was shining brightly) and stop at the Roanoke for breakfast. The whole family attended and we rode leisurely around the Island stopping for bloody marys, pancakes, omelette's and coffee. Steve wanted to know who was getting the truck and picking him up, but since it was my day we all continued around to finish the 13 mile loop.
Robin had promised to take us sailing if the weather cooperated but the gang didn't all want to come along so I called Sandy to see what her plans were and she slipped away to join us on the boat from Everett Marina. It was a calm day and we motored out of the harbor past lazy seals on the buoy toward Hat Island and Camano and the wind steadily picked up as the day went along. Rob showed me how his fancy computer system works to guide the boat (I did wonder if anyone could get us back if he fell overboard and we had to tack around a pick him up). We were engrossed in the I tunes he had on the computer and my theme song for the yer was readily available-"Lively up yourself" (Bob Marley). We drank wine and told jokes and caught up on family gossip as we reminisced about MOM. We had a gut busting, pee in your pants, moment-times like that don't happen every day, and we cruised back into port as the clouds rolled in.
Sean, Erica and Dan were preparing dinner at the Casita, and I invited extra guests-Todd & Sandy, Karen and Robin. We stopped at the store to add to the menu (I believe in the loaves and the fishes-somehow the food always seems bountiful), but I am sure my spontaneity leaves some in the lurch. Fortunately no one freaked out, stayed calm and flexible, and made my day the best ever!
Robin had promised to take us sailing if the weather cooperated but the gang didn't all want to come along so I called Sandy to see what her plans were and she slipped away to join us on the boat from Everett Marina. It was a calm day and we motored out of the harbor past lazy seals on the buoy toward Hat Island and Camano and the wind steadily picked up as the day went along. Rob showed me how his fancy computer system works to guide the boat (I did wonder if anyone could get us back if he fell overboard and we had to tack around a pick him up). We were engrossed in the I tunes he had on the computer and my theme song for the yer was readily available-"Lively up yourself" (Bob Marley). We drank wine and told jokes and caught up on family gossip as we reminisced about MOM. We had a gut busting, pee in your pants, moment-times like that don't happen every day, and we cruised back into port as the clouds rolled in.
Sean, Erica and Dan were preparing dinner at the Casita, and I invited extra guests-Todd & Sandy, Karen and Robin. We stopped at the store to add to the menu (I believe in the loaves and the fishes-somehow the food always seems bountiful), but I am sure my spontaneity leaves some in the lurch. Fortunately no one freaked out, stayed calm and flexible, and made my day the best ever!
Visit to Anton's
Last Thursday I visited Antons Hair shop with Bonnie. I know that in less than a week my hair will start to fall out again, so in anticipation, I decided to check out saving it this time and getting a wig of my own hair. From a previous visit, I knew that I would have to set an appointment to get it shaved this time so that it could be transformed as it came off into a wearable piece just like the style that I had so recently become accustomed to. This was Bonnie's first visit, and Steve, Sean and I had been joking about how Bonnie's red hair might be incorporated into my wig. We decided that taking the bangs would be best and I suggested that when Kurt was explaining the procedure to us. Momentarily Bonnie managed a nervous laugh as she contemplated the thought of having a mohawk for her upcoming son's wedding (just the position I was in just under a year ago). Then I suggested we both shave our heads and get two identical wigs-then we would really confuse people...We shared laughs and took before pictures. We will see if you all can tell when the wig replaces the fixed hair. Maybe this time I will be the wiser.
butterflies are free to fly, fly away
I stopped short as I headed out on my walk the other day with Mylo and Steve. Something caught my eye. It was a butterfly that had just alighted on the bush by the gate on my way out. It's wings were beautiful tones of brown, gold and yellow, but it's body had threads of teal green and deep blue. I had been studying the colors of silks for a project that Jodi and I are working on, and the color combinations were captivating, but the butterfly symbolism was seridipitous. The project is now formulated in my minds eye-wedding boxes-made from silk and sybolic of a beautiful fleeting creature.
Wednesday, May 6, 2009
Bloody Boogers
Life and death (blood and crust) all in one-what symbolism-that is what I wake up to at night. A sure sign that chemo is working again, and a symptom that I don't read about, so that merits documentation-aren't you all glad to read about it! It tends to be annoying, but I can sluff it off, blow it out, and be renewed. Action, progress, and much better than getting sick to my stomach. Wonder what is going on in the rest of my body...I am feeling less nauseous by the day and planning on getting my butt out of bed to go work out this morning. I have lost a bit of weight getting an appetite back again, but feeling good about that too. What a way to get in shape.
As for the mental aspect of repeating this process, I need to progressively remind myself of the benefits of readjustments in life. The time to reconnect with friends who have been through their own trials and tributes in this state of the economy-it's phenomenal! Relationships are stressed with times of financial downturn, people are out of jobs, the swine flu is going around (quit kissing pigs you guys and wear your masks-they do in Japan). We are afraid to get on a plane to sunny destinations because we are sparing our money and afraid of exposure, and it pours rain here intermittently with sucker patches lengthy enough to get a good walk in if you just seize the moment. Aunt Elise, I loved your email about getting drug in historic past. Today, the drug scene is meth labs, but yesterday it was about being drug to church for on Sunday, drug down the street to help a neighbor with their garden work, and drug to the bedroom to think about it if by chance you took a dime to help and you were caught by your parents for not doing the deed for free. What a change are country has seen.
External forces are easier to deal with than internal abnormalities. External forces we can fortify ourselves against, but internal come as such surprises, and we feel helpless. That is when we have to turn to emotional strength and glimpses of the grace of God; our spiritual side. It is a return to the whole makeup of the body. Too often we get comfortable with thinking we have control over our lives and forget to nurture and balance the other makeup of our beings. I love the offerings of friends who have dealt with adversities (and we all have whether we care to admit it or not) and their glimpses of beauty. I mentioned dancing to a dancing fool friend of mine when she called, and she invited me to her next Salsa class-I can't wait to go- "If you get the chance to sit it out or dance, I hope you dance"...
As for the mental aspect of repeating this process, I need to progressively remind myself of the benefits of readjustments in life. The time to reconnect with friends who have been through their own trials and tributes in this state of the economy-it's phenomenal! Relationships are stressed with times of financial downturn, people are out of jobs, the swine flu is going around (quit kissing pigs you guys and wear your masks-they do in Japan). We are afraid to get on a plane to sunny destinations because we are sparing our money and afraid of exposure, and it pours rain here intermittently with sucker patches lengthy enough to get a good walk in if you just seize the moment. Aunt Elise, I loved your email about getting drug in historic past. Today, the drug scene is meth labs, but yesterday it was about being drug to church for on Sunday, drug down the street to help a neighbor with their garden work, and drug to the bedroom to think about it if by chance you took a dime to help and you were caught by your parents for not doing the deed for free. What a change are country has seen.
External forces are easier to deal with than internal abnormalities. External forces we can fortify ourselves against, but internal come as such surprises, and we feel helpless. That is when we have to turn to emotional strength and glimpses of the grace of God; our spiritual side. It is a return to the whole makeup of the body. Too often we get comfortable with thinking we have control over our lives and forget to nurture and balance the other makeup of our beings. I love the offerings of friends who have dealt with adversities (and we all have whether we care to admit it or not) and their glimpses of beauty. I mentioned dancing to a dancing fool friend of mine when she called, and she invited me to her next Salsa class-I can't wait to go- "If you get the chance to sit it out or dance, I hope you dance"...
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